Welcome to the  2021 Advent Reflections. We are excited you are joining us on your advent journey. Each day we will present reflections from The Catholic Mom’s Prayer Companion. You will get a special sneak peek into this year-long book of daily reflections.  This Advent we hope that through these reflections you will dive deeper into your relationship with Jesus, our Mother Mary,  the Saints, and our beloved church.

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Let Gratitude be the pillow upon which you kneel to say your nightly prayer.

~Maya Angelou

The end of November has Americans thinking about Thanksgiving and Christians the world over thinking about Advent. This November is also a traditional month for remembering the dead. November’s endings and beginnings can be a source of anxiety ( forget Advent; a busy Christmas season is almost upon us!) or hope. The difference might just be gratitude.

Writing in the early 1300s, Meister Eckhart says. “If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is, ‘thankyou,’ it will be enough.” A lifetime feels like a long time to concentrate on one prayer. But what about Advent? What would happen if we dared to make, “thank you” the foundation of our prayers this season? If in the middle of all the busyness we learn to say our nightly prayers kneeling on the “pillow of gratitude”?

Dear Jesus, as November comes to a close, we remember again those who have died and we thank you for the gifts of their lives. We thank you for the many blessings with which our lives are filled. Thank you for Advent, for the chance at new beginnings. for promises of deliverance and salvation, thank you. For these next few weeks, if in your kindness you would grant us once grace, grant us the grace of a grateful heart. Thank you that you hear our prayers and for your boundless love and compassion.

To Ponder: What concrete change can you make to adopt gratitude as “the pillow on which you kneel” this Advent? How can you cultivate the prayer of thank you? How can you share your gratitude with others? ~ Michelle Jones

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What can you do to promote world peace? Go home and love your family.

~Saint Teresa of Calcutta

Christmas was my grandmother’s birthday. After Mass on Christmas Day, we would travel to her home to celebrate the holy day and exchange gifts. In the evening, we would return. This time we celebrated her birthday. Everyone would be there: her seven children, all her grandchildren, her two sisters, Grandpa’s brother, all their children, and their children’s children. All of us—aunts, uncles, cousins, second cousins, third cousins, and some neighbors—jammed together in a little duplex. The love of Christmas seemed to me all the more real surrounded by so much love and joy. It is my favorite childhood memory.

My grandparents have since passed. I rarely see my second and third cousins; however, I enjoy any opportunity I get to see and catch up with them. Still, all my aunts, uncles, cousins, and their children come together to celebrate important holidays. I revel in the fact that I am providing my own children with the wonderful opportunity to make the fond memories that I have.

Extended family provides us with a familial history. We discover that we are a part of a picture larger than our own little world. We become aware of the bigger family of which we are all a part: God’s family.

Father God, creator of family, thank you for my family. Help me to always love them, reach out to them, and share in their joys and sorrows.

To Ponder: In our busy world, losing track of extended family is easy. How can you keep in touch with family members: make a call, send a little letter or e-mail, make a lunch date, or plan a family reunion?
~ Kelly Guest

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National Day of Listening

And I want to repeat these three words: please, thank you, sorry. Three essential words! . . . Let us say these words in our families! 

~Pope Francis

A man of few words, my grandfather once remarked that the best conversationalist is a good listener. Listening shows courtesy and respect. It requires focused attention and a slower pace.

Today, on the National Day of Listening, let’s reflect on how well we listen to others and how courteously we communicate with them. If you’re anything like me, every third sentence is a panicked interjection: “Eat!” or “Find your shoes!” or “Don’t you dare stick a tomato in the light socket!”

As improbable as it might seem, greater domestic peace might be achieved by phrases such as, “Please eat the dinner I cooked for you with so much love” or “Thank you for putting your shoes away now so you can find them later.” Or even, “I’d be happy to listen to the reasons why you thought sticking a tomato in the light socket was a good idea.”

Moms really do set the tone and pace of the household, even though it feels sometimes like those things are beyond our control. Words like please and thank you and sorry show that we care about the person we’re talking to. And that, more than anything else, might just make them more willing to listen.

Open my ears to hear your will, O Lord, and open my lips to speak your words

To Ponder: Have you forgotten about common courtesies in the hullabaloo of daily life? Try to say please, thank you, and sorry a little more often and see what effect it has on the people around you.
~ Karee Santos

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Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others.

~Marcus Tullius Cicero

In our home, Thanksgiving dinner is the most anticipated meal of the year. Everyone loves turkey and all the trimmings, not to mention the various dishes I make with the leftovers. Friends shared with us that they love to make Thanksgiving dinner more than once a year, and that got us started on a new tradition: multiple Thanksgiving dinners to share with friends. The number of Thanksgiving meals we have each year varies, but what we do does not

For each of the meals, we invite some friends over, break out the good china, and I cook an entire Thanksgiving meal—a big turkey and all the trimmings from my father’s stuffing recipe to homemade mashed potatoes to fresh-baked rolls. We share our home with our friends, relaxing and talking over dinner the way we cannot on real Thanksgiving when people tend to travel to visit family

What this does for us is that it reminds us to always be thankful to God for his many blessings. While we still observe Thanksgiving on the fourth Thursday of November, this new tradition makes it much more purposeful. We stop everything else and center an entire day on giving thanks for our blessings.

Father in heaven, help me to be more thankful for your many blessings. Teach me how to notice even the smallest blessings in my life so that I may always be reminded of your love for me.

To Ponder: Do you give thanks each day for your blessings? What can you do to make it a more purposeful act? ~ Christine Johnson

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God asks little, but he gives much.

~Saint John Chrysostom

I smile today, thinking of the little ones who can’t wait to peel back that cardboard door marked 1 on their Advent calendars and be rewarded with the very first of those twenty-four morsels of chocolate. Advent may have already begun, but for most of the world today marks the start of the Christmas countdown.

We moms often get so caught up in the frenzy of this season that we miss its tiny treasures: the toddler lighting the Advent wreath for the very first time, the handwritten greetings from afar, or even those handmade gifts of pine cones and papier-mâché. We fixate on our lists, crossing off our acquisitions and keeping our appointments. The swirl of this month, its busyness and bounty, threaten to overwhelm us.

Today, as we remember the true reason for our Advent preparations, let’s linger in the giftedness that is all around us: The scent of the greenery reminding us of new life . . .

The deep violet harkening penitence to prepare our hearts . . .

The star and the flames pointing us toward the Light of the World . . .

And yes, even the presents, given and received with intentional love.

In our giftedness, we are given the opportunity to serve as stewards for those who go without sustenance, shelter, or even love. In giving, we receive.

Father, source of every gift, help me to embrace this Advent season. Thank you for the incredible gifts you pour into my life, especially for my precious family. May I journey toward you mindfully, grateful at every turn for your love.

To Ponder: How can you be more mindful of the gifts you give and are given this month? ~ Lisa M. Hendey

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International Day for the Abolition of Slavery

Boundaries help us to be the best we can be—in God’s image. They let us see God as he really is. They enable us to negotiate life, fulfilling our responsibilities and requirements. 

~Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend

When people rose to abolish slavery, they formally acknowledged the universal truth of the dignity of all human persons. Slavery is an extreme boundary violation of this dignity. God endows each person with unique gifts to fulfill his or her personal mission. But when we operate in this world with poor personal boundaries, we tarnish our gifts and compromise our dignity.

Pleasing others, lacking clarity about who we are and what we want, allowing others to enter our homes or psyches with ill effects weakens us and the entire Body of Christ. Poor boundaries make it increasingly difficult to authentically love others. Our sense of self can become so fragmented that there is not enough left to gift to another. We’ve let the world and others “pick our orchard.” Then there are no apples left when we want to give one to a person of our choosing.

Isn’t that a self-imposed form of modern-day slavery?

Breaking free starts with self-knowledge. God gives us knowledge of ourselves when we seek our fulfillment in him. Slave owners tried to break down their slaves by dehumanizing them. We must stop dehumanizing ourselves by ignoring the unique callings and needs of the soul God has given us. By letting God show us who we truly are, we respect our time, our thoughts, our feelings, and our desires, and we start establishing boundaries to protect them. From that place, we are free persons able to give authentic love to another.

Jesus, so many people wanted a piece of you in your journey on this earth. You modeled how to love others while also staying connected to your Father. Help us have the right balance between being generous and taking needed time for ourselves.

To Ponder: How healthy are your boundaries? What can you do to improve them so you can authentically love the people God has put in your life?
~ Christina M. Weber

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Saint Francis Xavier

He walked with a joyful, calm face. . . . Everywhere he went he went with laughter in his mouth.

~An Observer of Saint Francis Xavier

Saint Francis Xavier (1506–1552) is regarded as one of the greatest missionaries in Christianity, baptizing tens of thousands in his widespread travels. Despite language barriers, inadequate funding, and resistance from European officials, Saint Francis Xavier spread his Christian faith in lasting ways throughout the Far East.

Total confidence in God kept this evangelist from being discouraged in the face of obstacles. Instead, he was filled with a sense of ongoing joy and enthusiasm. Living among the poor, sharing their food, and administering to the sick, Saint Francis Xavier preached the Gospel by living it joyfully.

As Christians, we, too, are called to “go and preach to all nations.” We may not be called to distant shores like Saint Francis Xavier. That’s okay. There’s more than enough mission territory right where we live, among our family, friends, co-workers, and neighbors. But what Saint Francis Xavier teaches us most poignantly is that the spirit of joy must permeate all our efforts.

Joy is something that can slip quickly through my fingers, despite having a loving husband, great kids, good health, and rewarding work. It’s so easy for me to focus on
minor irritants and setbacks and on what I don’t have instead of on what I do.

Saint Francis Xavier, you discovered that emptying yourself for others cheerfully is the secret to spreading the Good News. Infuse me with the joy you radiated in sharing your love for Jesus.

To Ponder: What words would people use to describe you? Joyful and calm? Would others want to be Christian because of your disposition? Today, pledge to find an opportunity to bring someone else a little bit of joy.
~ Elizabeth Ficocelli

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Build an oratory within yourself, and there have Jesus on the altar of your heart.

~Saint Paul of the Cross

It’s getting noisy out there, isn’t it? The music, the commercials, the shopping malls . . . it can quickly result in sensory overload. It seems as if every space is filled. For me, it doesn’t take long to crave negative space, space that is filled with nothing.

In music, we recognize negative space as silence. When musicians remove noise and strategically incorporate silence, they also add emphasis and lend definition to their work. Can you imagine an arrangement of “Let All Mortal Flesh Keep Silence” performed by an ensemble of four vocalists, a horn section, three guitars, bass, and congas? No, because that stands in direct contrast to the song’s very message— standing in awe and meditating on the fact that God has become man.

Such an ensemble is also inappropriate for Advent, a time when we remember and reflect that Christ came to us as a baby in the silent night—meek and humble in the unlikeliest quarter of a small town. No fanfare, no trumpet blasts, no procession. What sense would it make to prepare to reexperience this event by filling our lives with noise on top of noise? That stands in direct contrast to this season’s very purpose. Let’s allow this Advent to be memorable not for how we try to supersize it, but for how we don’t. Seek negative space. Savor the silence. De-clutter your heart. Make room to receive Jesus when he comes.

Lord Jesus, remove from my heart all that separates me from you.

To Ponder:Take a look at your calendar. What nonessential activities can be removed so you can savor a bit more silence this Advent?
~ Lisa A. Schmidt

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International Volunteer Day

The call of God is not just for a select few but for everyone. Whether I hear God’s call or not depends on the condition of my ears, and exactly what I hear depends upon my spiritual attitude.

~Oswald Chambers

“I’m looking for a volunteer.”
Do those words fill you with dread? Do they remind you of school days when you didn’t know the answer and were terrified you’d be called on? For me, that panic always hit in math or science class. While I’d confidently raise my hand elsewhere, I wanted to shrivel up and disappear when my algebra teacher or, heaven forbid, my physics teacher asked a question.

Once I got to college, the fear subsided. By then, I knew my own strengths and could focus my studies on subjects where I was eager to join the discussion.

God has called us all to join the discussion. Toward that end, he’s given each of us gifts—gifts he wants us to share with other people. He needs butchers, bakers, and candlestick makers, and singers, lectors, and religious-education teachers.

But that’s not the whole story. If the only thing that mattered was expertise, he’d have made a lot more experts and many fewer lay people. While every ministry needs someone knowledgeable to lead it, it also needs people who are gifted with eagerness to help, to participate in the community, and to join the discussion with the goal of spreading God’s word.

Lord, help me to hear your call with open ears, an open heart, and a willingness to join the discussion.

To Ponder:God has made sure that we all have something to contribute, even if we haven’t quite figured it out for our selves. What volunteer opportunities will enrich your life and spirit as well as help others?
~ Lisa Lawmaster Hess

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